From the insanity of Panic and Anxiety Disorder to the calm through fitness.. This is my transformation story.

3.13.2011

Speed Bump

3.13.11

Hit a minor speed bump.
On day 3 of panic attacks, so i haven't been training. The weather has been cooperating and I had every intention of starting C25K this weekend, but my body had it's own idea, and i am a bit troubled by it.

I haven't had an attack in quite a while, I've had uneasy feelings in certain situations, but not a full-on panic attack.

It started Friday mid-afternoon. Our new carpet was being installed, hubby was in the dining room playing on his computer and I was cleaning the kitchen and chatting with him when i started to feel 'edgy'.

I went outside on the back deck to catch my breathe and cool down (with the edginess comes hot flashes and the feeling of not being able to breathe), once i caught the chill i went back in the house and had some cold water to drink. I felt OK after about 5 minutes.

Saturday, hubby and I were out and about running errands. We decided to go to a local tex-mex place, but on the way there we were detoured because of flooding. I got a little edgy a couple of times, but nothing too severe. We got to the restaurant, and there were a ton of little kids there, i mean LITTLE, like the ones that scream and cry for no reason at all but to hear themselves? yeah, those. I spotted a booth in the far corner of the quieter side of the main room and asked the host if we could sit there, he told us he had to have it cleared, but we could wait if we wanted. Well, that waiting period did me in, we never got seated in that booth because no one ever cleared it, so he put us in the main dining room seated behind a party of 6, and surrounded by little babies. Look, I love little babies, but not that many in one place in a crowded bustling dining room when I'm already 'edgy'.

It took the waitress forever and a day to get to us, and by that time I was already in 'flight' mode. So we left and got stuck in traffic on the way to the U-turn on the highway (because of the flooding). That's when the big one started, tunnel vision, stomach drops, shaking, light-headed, chest heavy, hot flashes..... to name a few. I saw the exit ramp, I saw the other side of the highway (which was moving at a fast pace), there was no reason to have an attack that severe. I vocally tried to calm myself down, nothing was working... next step was to jump out of the truck and run, or cry, but hubby pulled into the adjacent parking lot and cut through and took the back roads to familiar roads with no traffic. He's a God send.  

Today, day 3,  I haven't had any 'attacks', but i have felt off-the-mark. Not sure if it's the fear of having another attack, or the fact that I'm just frustrated at it all. I'm weaning off of my meds so we can start a family, and I've been doing AWESOME with the weaning, minus a couple of very minor events that had to do with the wean itself. Now this.. 3 days of hell.


Last week i started a food journal, and i only logged 2 days. Looking back, it's clear that I'm barely reaching the 1200 minimum mark. So i decided today to make sure i did. Hubby went grocery shopping for us, since that is usually a place that triggers an attack because of the loud music in the store (why!?) and the crowds and the lines.

I entered the nutrition label information, weighing my foods, making sure the portion sizes I'm consuming are correct; I'm up to about 1500 calories today. The majority of those calories came after 1pm, and since then i haven't been feeling 'edgy'. Either the lack of calories is triggering the attacks, OR it's just a coincidence that they are subsiding. 

I'm going to have to monitor and maybe play around to see if maybe lack of calories isn't creating the problem.

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